Anyone interested in true crime should try watching BBC Crimewatch on YouTube. It has everything the morbidly curious could want: 1980s aesthetics and production values, police guests with absolutely no media training, reconstructions with acting straight out of Nuns on the Run, and a parade of nicotine-stained victims who are just awful.

I'm not a massive drinker, but I've been given a nice bottle of whiskey for my birthday. It's the first bottle of whiskey I've ever owned, and although I like the idea of being able to neck a neat bolt like a burned-out gumshoe or some loafered exec from Howard's Way, I'm instead having to experiment with various 'mixers'. Robinsons double strength orange & pineapple squash, if anyone's interested, doesn't work.

When you get past 40 you realise ELO has been waiting for you. The Electric Light Orchestra doesn’t follow the usual, chronological constraints of pop music. They exist in a floating timeline which one day intersects with yours, and suddenly peers who you respected have an opinion on Jeff Lynne. It's horrible.

Wooo! I'm finally getting with the 90's and starting a blog. Truthfully, only because of the SEO benefits. I haven't kept a diary since Optimus Prime died, and i'm under no illusion that anyone wants to read my ramblings. And if I'm honest with myself, this is almost certainly the first AND last post I'll ever make. Anyhoo, that's all for now. Leave them wanting more etc. Salu